Who is Mimosa Mama?  And what is this “Champagne Shenanigans” book thing about?

I am not a writer.   But I wrote a book.   You can tell I’m not a writer because I started that last sentence with “But” and I vaguely remember from Middle School that this is not grammatically correct.

I have nothing profound to share with the planet.

For most intents and purposes I am a shallow woman.

I am not sensitive.  It is likely that I will never cry with you.

My book contains a plethora of politically incorrect statements.   An ex-boyfriend use to call me a “saucy wench.”   I liked it then and it’s no less fitting now.

I’m a swearer.  Not extensively so – somewhere between PG-13 and R.  If this bothers you then I say you’ve come to the wrong place.

Champagne Shenanigans is not ALL about mimosas.  This is just the starting place for the rest of the BS I have to share with you.

One last thing.  The names I use have been “pretend protected” to give the illusion that I care whether or not these people are okay with me sharing stories that involve them.  It is only an illusion.

I have no agent or publisher.  Just doin’ this crap on my little own.  I also have no lawyer.  Yet.  But if you sue me you should know I also have no money.  Go ahead.  Suck blood from a turnip.

I will take a chance and share some of my non-writing skills with you, hoping that when the time comes you will see your way fit to actually purchase one of my books – NOT borrow one from someone else who has been duped into their purchase.  I’ll never make it if you do crap like that.

Follow Mimosa Mama on facebook to get the scoop on her updates.  She’s got a lot in the works and you’re not going to want to miss out on her happenings, appearances, and events.

Mimosas

The mimosa just may be the worlds perfect drink.  Assuming you have the right ingredients that is.  And it is not, I repeat N-O-T just for brunches and special occasions.  That’s just plain stupid.  It’s a good damn drink, and there’s no reason to wait.  That’s a stupid rule made up by stupid people, I hate nothing more than being bound by social rules.  REBEL I tell you!

Start with a sparkling wine (the snobs in France won’t let us call it “champagne” unless it comes from their little Champagne region.  Also stupid.)  I prefer Brut.  Brut has a much lower sugar content than many of its cousins, less than 15 grams per liter, whereas some contain more than 50.  The oj we’re going to add is plenty sweet enough for Mimosa Mama, and frankly where there’s more sugar there is more likelihood of that champagne headache the next morning.

Add orange juice to taste.  I like lots of pulp.  It gives my drink a little character, and oj pulp is high in fiber, helps in smooth evacuation of the bowels.  Who doesn’t need a little help evacuating their bowels?  Yes, it’s a veritable health food drink (in moderation).

Most days I like a good half and half mixture.  Occasionally I will lean more towards one side or the other in a good 60/40 concoction, but half and half is a great place to start.  Just keep experimenting until you find what you like.

You can also use other juices.  There are many other recipes I’ve found that vary the mimosa, or make it something else altogether.  I myself will substitute grape juice now and again, and I call this an “uvamosa” – uva is Spanish for “grape”.  I don’t like mixing other boozes in – part of the reason I love the mimosa is how easy it is on my system (I’m 41 years old you know!).

Sit back and enjoy your Mimosa Moment.  Mimosa Moments, I find, are better enjoyed with Mimosa Mama’s first book “Mimosa O’Clock” in your hands.  Ditch the spouse, pawn the kids off, lock the door, and breath in a moment of peace in your life.

Cheers!